That Mitchell and Webb Look: Series 3 Episode 1

This is the first episode of the third series of That Mitchell and Webb Look. It is the thirteenth episode overall. It originally aired June 11th, 2009.

Synopsis

Comedy sketch show starring David Mitchell and Robert Webb.

There's a chance to see the world's least successful replacement for the doorbell, a game show from after the apocalypse, and Queen Victoria's unusual objection to a tree. Plus Santa's ne'er-do-well brother Russ returns to the North Pole.

Sketch List

• Poirot (Evil Voice)
• Jan Hankl's Flank Pat System
• The Apprentice
• The Quiz Broadcast
• Brain Surgeon
• Behind the Scenes: Action Figures
• The Policemen: Police Brutality
• Get Me Hennimore: Lazy Susan
• Linden Trees
• Behind the Scenes: Dog Cannon
• Is British Television Dumbing Down?
• Lazy Writers: Undercover Secret Spies
• Russ Claus

Sketches

Picture	Title/Description/Cast	Sidenotes
	Poirot (Evil Voice) Poirot ousts a murderous woman on the basis of her evil voice. Poirot: David Mitchell Poirot's Sidekick: Robert Webb Susan Brown: Sarah Hadland Freddie: James Bachman	Written by Mitchell and Webb.
	Jan Hankl's Flank Pat System Jan Hankl introduces his patented flank pat system for finding books on shelves. Jan Hankl: Robert Webb Announcer / Edward: David Mitchell Man #1: Mark Evans Man #2: James Bachman Man #3: Toby Davies Woman #1: Sarah Hadland Woman #2: Abigail Burdess	Written by Simon Kane.
	The Apprentice Two TV producers discuss how to improve The Apprentice. The answer: real idiots. Boss / TV Producer #1: David Mitchell TV Producer #2 / Employee #2: Robert Webb Employee #1: James Bachman Employee #3: Sarah Hadland	Written by David Mitchell and Jonathan Dryeden Taylor.
	The Quiz Broadcast Recurring: A post-apocalyptic quiz show has trouble with its frenetic contestants. Host: David Mitchell Patrick: Robert Webb Sheila: Sarah Hadland Unidentified Male 282: James Bachman	This is the first appearance of The Quiz Broadcast. Test Card: "Help Me!" Winner: Patrick; his prize is "fuel." Written by David Mitchell and Jonathan Dryden Taylor, incorporating material from a sketch by Joel Morris & Jason Hazeley.
	Brain Surgeon A bragadocious brain surgeon meets his match. Lionel: Robert Webb Geoff: David Mitchell Man: James Bachman Woman #1: Sarah Hadland Woman #2: Abigail Burdess	Written by Jesse Armstrong, Sam Bain, and the Dawson Brothers.
	Behind the Scenes: Action Figures David and Robert get their own action figures, though Robert isn't too impressed with his portrayal. Robert Webb: Himself David Mitchell: Himself	Robert's figure being anatomically correct is a nod to the 2006 film, Confetti, where his penis was repeatedly shown uncensored. Written by Chris Reddy.
	The Policemen: Police Brutality Recurring: A police offer vehemently denounces his hatred for a community support officer. Police Officer: David Mitchell Community Support Officer: Robert Webb Boy: Robert Medge	This sketch marks the first appearance of The Policemen. Written by Mitchell and Webb.
	Get Me Hennimore: Lazy Susan Recurring: Hennimore needs to make sure that his boss' golfing friend, Jacques, doesn't touch his alcohol cabinet, incoveniently disguised as a set of Edwardian golf clubs. Hilarity ensues. Hennimore: Robert Webb Boss: David Mitchell Jacques: James Bachman	This is the first appearance of the "Get Me Hennimore" series of recurring sketches. Portrait: The painting shows Hennimore's boss golfing. Once the situation goes awry, it is spray-painted over with "Fuck you Niklaus" by Jacques. Written by David Mitchell and Toby Davies.
	Linden Trees Queen Victoria makes a startling remark about a certain smell to the Prime Minister. Queen Victoria: Robert Webb Prime Minister: David Mitchell American Ambassador: James Bachman	Written by Simon Kane.
	Behind the Scenes: Dog Cannon Robert struggles to sell David on his idea of rendering the doorbell obsolete through dogs fired through cannons. Robert Webb: Himself David Mitchell: Himself	Written by Richard Law.
	Is British Television Dumbing Down? Blackout: The host of Hard News asks the serious questions. Host: Robert Webb Will Fenton: David Mitchell	Written by Robert Webb.
	Lazy Writers: Undercover Secret Spies Recurring: The lazy writers, unable to properly research a spy drama but inspired by Octopussy, create one regardless. John Gibson / Matthew: Robert Webb Andrew Turner / Steve: David Mitchell Head Spy: James Bachman Rookie Spy: Sarah Hadland	Written by Mitchell and Webb.
	Russ Claus Drama unfolds at the North Pole as Russ Claus goes to Santa asking for money. Russ Claus: Robert Webb Santa Claus: David Mitchell Joyce Claus: Sarah Hadland	Written by Chris Reddy.